All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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