he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Randomize
