this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
