____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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