so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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