I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
