i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
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