Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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