My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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