There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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