She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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