i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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