At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
