Are we in a gay sports bar?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
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