We're facebook friends in real life
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
