pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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