Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
