Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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