it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize