I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
The uberlube is also flammable
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
