so explain again why im purple
no
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
