dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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