I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize