Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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