Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
