it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize