my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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