you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
