it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
