i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
