is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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