That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
