whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Randomize
