I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
