Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
