i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
