the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
