It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
