At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
