i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Randomize
