Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
It's like God shit irony all over that family
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize