based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize