If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
