im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
