Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
