I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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