You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
