Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Randomize
