If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
