Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
