i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize