I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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