But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
